我的心好痛 一直避免自己陷入太深 陷入那個無法自拔的情緒中 但是 我陷入了 也逃不出去 越陷越深 心裏有股說不出的糾結感
我妄想 自己得不到的
越是得不到 我越想要
當他說 我們即使結婚也不幸福的 因為我這麼喜歡刺激感 很快的 我就會失去興趣 我不知道該怎麼辯解
也許吧?
My heart is deep painful. I tried not to involve in so much. Not be trapped in the emotion, but I failed. I can’t escape. Since I struggled more, I fell into more. I could feel there is a net which trapped my heart inside me.
I desired what I am not allowed to have. Since I could not have it, my desire is just getting stronger and stronger.
He told me we would not be happy, if we get married. Because I like the drama so much, soon I will lose my interest in him.
I don’t know what to say. Maybe?
我告訴自己 不 我們不會幸福的
因為我們這麼喜歡彼此 因為我們這麼相似 因為我們有這麼多美好的回憶 所以我們不會幸福的 我們在一起只會彼此傷害 越是喜歡 那把刀插的越深
I feel sad when he said so. I told myself we will not be happy to be together, because we love each so much.
No, we will not be happy together, because we are so similar, because we have so many happy memories.
No, we will not be happy. We will only hurt each other. When we love more, it hurts more.
越是得不到的感覺 牽動著那把刀 一開始就像是被水果小刀 切到一點 不怎麼感到痛 但是 血卻汨汨流出 而痛楚也開始增加 越是疼痛 你才知道 這傷口 切的有多深 但是你無法想像 只不過是這麼小的傷口 為什麼你會痛不欲生?
It’s a knife, a small knife. When it cut me, I would not feel so hurt. After a while, I see the blood come from your wound. Then I feel the pain. It hurts so much. I can’t imagine from the beginning, because the wound is so small. Why is hurting so much? Why am I overwhelmed with sorrow?
你寧可刺的更深 挖的更深 讓你一次痛醒 但是 即使你這麼小心 還是刺傷自己了
眼淚 滴在傷口上
你把手指含在嘴裡 告訴自己 我們不會幸福的 不會的
你求他 心裡渴望著他離去
但是你的身體 不由自主的 想要他留下 手就伸了過去 想一把抓著他
I would rather it hurts more and I would wake up earlier. However, even I am so cautious, I still hurt myself.
Tears drop on the wound. I hold my finger in my mouth and convince myself “no, we will not be happy.”
In my mind, I beg him to leave, but my body loses control. I reach my hand to his arm and try to drag him.
你知道是夢 但你還是感受到他的體溫了 他的手臂 他的衣服
你希望他回頭看你一眼 雖然你害怕的不敢睜眼
你希望他輕喚你的名字 雖然你不敢聽
你希望他的鬍渣滑過你的臉頰 雖然你不敢呼吸 屏息以待
但你心裡知道的
I knew it is a dream, but I still feel his temperature, his arm, and his clothes.
I’m hoping he will turn back and look at me; even I’m not daring to see.
I’m hoping he will call my name gently; even I’m not daring to listen.
I’m hoping to feel his beard slip from my cheek; even I can’t breath.
But I knew it. It is a dream. I have to open my eyes. I have to.
